The gang, having a 'picnic' dinner:
Maggie, with the new Rabbit toy I knit.
Cameron, claiming the Bunny as his own and making it obvious I need to knit 2:
Maggie, with her definition of ONE cookie:
And Cam at the ballgame with Daddy!
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Cute Baby Pictures
Very busy here, working and prepping for the block party this weekend - but I couldn't leave you all high and dry! I will appease the blog with sweet baby pictures.
The gang, having a 'picnic' dinner:
Maggie, with the new Rabbit toy I knit.
Cameron, claiming the Bunny as his own and making it obvious I need to knit 2:
Maggie, with her definition of ONE cookie:
And Cam at the ballgame with Daddy!
The gang, having a 'picnic' dinner:
Maggie, with the new Rabbit toy I knit. Cameron, claiming the Bunny as his own and making it obvious I need to knit 2: Maggie, with her definition of ONE cookie:And Cam at the ballgame with Daddy!
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
'I want DADA!"
This weekend was a ton of fun stuff for the kids:
- Ed the Music Man Saturday morning
- Thomas the Train on the big screen for Cam
- End of year church picnic on Sunday morning
- Birthday party for a friend Sunday night (Cam stayed home with Daddy, while Maggie was the bell of the ball in a cute little party dress)
- Triple A baseball for Cam and Aaron on Monday night
- Dinner out with Mama for Maggie on Monday night
Last night, when Aaron got home with Cam from the baseball game (at 8:30 PM - very tired little boy), Aaron went out of the room and Cam yells I WANT DADA! So I moved over to where Aaron was standing, and Cam says 'NO Mama. That where Dada goes.'.
Trying hard not to get bitter that Aaron is getting 100% of the credit for all the fun things that I find to send him and Cam too! Although it's pretty awesome how much Cam loves his daddy. And Maggie is still mine, all mine.
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Getting support
I've had this post in my head for a while, but it's kind of hard to write. And then I've read a few great posts (Calliope and Rachael in particular), and it's forcing me to share with you all.
I like to think of myself as a tough broad. That is also how I viewed my mother. Raising me as a single mom, she had her own business and maintained two households on her own. Now that I've been through what I've been through - my mom has revealed herself to me. She is just as big of a mushball as I am. We are the human equivalent of Brach's Strawberry BonBons (hard on the outside and soft on the inside). Even before IF, I'd managed to go through so really crappy times. I had an ex who hit me, and when I moved out (right after he hit me that first time, Mama didn't raise no dummy) he stalked me and threatened to kill me. That was fun. And then my next boyfriend managed to get a hold of my credit card and charge up $18,000. That was an interesting find when I kicked him out (for other reasons). Both times I managed to pick myself off, dust myself off, and move on. Mostly alone. I just dealt with it.
Then I went through IF. And the ectopic, the miscarriage, the birth of my son, finding out we were having twins, a twin pregnancy along with caring for a baby... and the death of Nora. Somewhere along that path, I realized I just wasn't THAT tough. And I didn't NEED to be. I leaned on Aaron. I shared here - not only to help me, but to let others going through the same things know they weren't alone. I cultivated my circle of friends. We moved into a 'real' neighborhood, where people CARE about each other. We joined the local church. All of that? It makes even the most painful of events bearable.
But. And this is a BIG but. You need to reach out first. You need to make connections. Be a friend. Say hi to that neighbor. Which is hard, DAMN hard, when you feel like shit. But it's helped me immensely. I call it 'faking it until I make it' - and it's served me well. I signed up for a quilt class 7 years ago. The woman in that class, we just clicked with each other. So we kept meeting. And meeting. And now, 7 years later, 2 of those woman are the godmothers to my daughter. It's group of woman who would (and have) swoop in and make things better. Sure, on my saddest days, I've have to FORCE myself to go and sit and sew. But it's been a lifeline.
In my neighborhood, I've taken on the task of a block party. Is it a pain in the ass? Oh hell yes. But already I've noticed people coming out of their houses and hanging out more. I think it's great. And I've started up a card night with friends (which reminds me, I need to schedule one soon!). And, yes, friendships on the internet are great - but in person contact is SO important and as a busy working mom - it's definitely the first thing to go. But having someone to come over and just sit and hang out with you when you are sad and lonely? It's wonderful. (Suzanne, Tara and Tarsha - if you are reading this - thank you). Or someone to force you to step away from the babies for a night and enjoy a movie? (Amanda?) And if you don't have people close - it's just as wonderful to have our computer friends (like when my Jen was going through losing Luke - I can't tell you how hard I was pushing good thoughts through the keyboard at her).
I guess what I'm saying is that on the outside, I joke around and act like a tough gal. But on the inside I'm a big ball of mush and having the wonderful friends and connections that I've been able to make over the past ten years - it's priceless. And I task other busy woman out there to take the time and cultivate your own circles. Throw your own block parties or card parties or even start a craft night. It's more than just a night out - it's a support network that god save you, I hope you only need for venting about annoying (but otherwise wonderful) husbands.
I like to think of myself as a tough broad. That is also how I viewed my mother. Raising me as a single mom, she had her own business and maintained two households on her own. Now that I've been through what I've been through - my mom has revealed herself to me. She is just as big of a mushball as I am. We are the human equivalent of Brach's Strawberry BonBons (hard on the outside and soft on the inside). Even before IF, I'd managed to go through so really crappy times. I had an ex who hit me, and when I moved out (right after he hit me that first time, Mama didn't raise no dummy) he stalked me and threatened to kill me. That was fun. And then my next boyfriend managed to get a hold of my credit card and charge up $18,000. That was an interesting find when I kicked him out (for other reasons). Both times I managed to pick myself off, dust myself off, and move on. Mostly alone. I just dealt with it.
Then I went through IF. And the ectopic, the miscarriage, the birth of my son, finding out we were having twins, a twin pregnancy along with caring for a baby... and the death of Nora. Somewhere along that path, I realized I just wasn't THAT tough. And I didn't NEED to be. I leaned on Aaron. I shared here - not only to help me, but to let others going through the same things know they weren't alone. I cultivated my circle of friends. We moved into a 'real' neighborhood, where people CARE about each other. We joined the local church. All of that? It makes even the most painful of events bearable.
But. And this is a BIG but. You need to reach out first. You need to make connections. Be a friend. Say hi to that neighbor. Which is hard, DAMN hard, when you feel like shit. But it's helped me immensely. I call it 'faking it until I make it' - and it's served me well. I signed up for a quilt class 7 years ago. The woman in that class, we just clicked with each other. So we kept meeting. And meeting. And now, 7 years later, 2 of those woman are the godmothers to my daughter. It's group of woman who would (and have) swoop in and make things better. Sure, on my saddest days, I've have to FORCE myself to go and sit and sew. But it's been a lifeline.
In my neighborhood, I've taken on the task of a block party. Is it a pain in the ass? Oh hell yes. But already I've noticed people coming out of their houses and hanging out more. I think it's great. And I've started up a card night with friends (which reminds me, I need to schedule one soon!). And, yes, friendships on the internet are great - but in person contact is SO important and as a busy working mom - it's definitely the first thing to go. But having someone to come over and just sit and hang out with you when you are sad and lonely? It's wonderful. (Suzanne, Tara and Tarsha - if you are reading this - thank you). Or someone to force you to step away from the babies for a night and enjoy a movie? (Amanda?) And if you don't have people close - it's just as wonderful to have our computer friends (like when my Jen was going through losing Luke - I can't tell you how hard I was pushing good thoughts through the keyboard at her).
I guess what I'm saying is that on the outside, I joke around and act like a tough gal. But on the inside I'm a big ball of mush and having the wonderful friends and connections that I've been able to make over the past ten years - it's priceless. And I task other busy woman out there to take the time and cultivate your own circles. Throw your own block parties or card parties or even start a craft night. It's more than just a night out - it's a support network that god save you, I hope you only need for venting about annoying (but otherwise wonderful) husbands.
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Dress Input please
I love this dress. I want to get it to wear to a friend's (afternoon, outdoor) wedding.
Thoughts? Remembering that I'm MUCH larger than the model (but this is from etsy - so the woman is doing a custom size for me). I think it'll look great on a plus sized person, but double-checking with my peeps. I'm thinking that my boobs will ROCK in this dress and the fun poofy skirt is a good thing - any fashionistas out there to help me?
Thoughts? Remembering that I'm MUCH larger than the model (but this is from etsy - so the woman is doing a custom size for me). I think it'll look great on a plus sized person, but double-checking with my peeps. I'm thinking that my boobs will ROCK in this dress and the fun poofy skirt is a good thing - any fashionistas out there to help me?
Monday, June 6, 2011
How to throw an awesome party
Does anyone have memories of your Mom throwing cocktail parties? The excitement of a PARTY at your house (and it wasn't even any one's birthday!). And getting to see grown-ups at your house, and as you got older, maybe even helping 'serve'. I've mentioned before, but Aaron and I used throw a lot of dinner parties - Aaron is a great cook, and I love having people over. But I've found it's hard when little kids are in the mix. Now that my kids are somewhat older - I've found a great solution.
We have big open living room. Which we built with the idea of kids in mind. The whole area is pretty much childproofed, and there are plenty of toys for all ages. So what we do is I invite people to come over at around 5:30 or 6. The grown ups get a cheese plate, and the kids get a big 'party table' (a folding 6 foot table with a cheap plastic cover and balloons. Always get balloons).I feed the kids hot dogs, brownies and ice cream while the grown up mill around and talk and play with the kids.
In the meantime, I have the dining room set up with candles, real silverware, linens... and the 'grown up' dinner. Once all the kids are fed, I take tired Maggie upstairs, the guests are all chatting happily, and Aaron serves up grown up dinner. Then, the kids all all comfortable enough with each other that they play in the living room, while the grown ups can eat and drink and relax in the dining room! It's awesome!
Cam stayed up with the 'big kids' (I think the oldest was 10) until everyone left at 9:30 - and everyone had a great time.
We have big open living room. Which we built with the idea of kids in mind. The whole area is pretty much childproofed, and there are plenty of toys for all ages. So what we do is I invite people to come over at around 5:30 or 6. The grown ups get a cheese plate, and the kids get a big 'party table' (a folding 6 foot table with a cheap plastic cover and balloons. Always get balloons).I feed the kids hot dogs, brownies and ice cream while the grown up mill around and talk and play with the kids.
In the meantime, I have the dining room set up with candles, real silverware, linens... and the 'grown up' dinner. Once all the kids are fed, I take tired Maggie upstairs, the guests are all chatting happily, and Aaron serves up grown up dinner. Then, the kids all all comfortable enough with each other that they play in the living room, while the grown ups can eat and drink and relax in the dining room! It's awesome!
Cam stayed up with the 'big kids' (I think the oldest was 10) until everyone left at 9:30 - and everyone had a great time.
Thursday, June 2, 2011
I'm too excited about Groupon
They say that finding a good deal is as great as good sex. I'm not so sure about that, but I have been in a rather good mood over the past great deals I've gotten on Groupon. If you don't do Groupon, you totally should.
Just this past week I've gotten two awesome deals. First was $45 for 6 meals at Dream Dinners. Where I go every single month to make my food. That normally would have cost me $70. Sweet! I must have re-read the fine print 100 times to be sure that existing customers could use that deal. Which we could - hurrah!
Perhaps you remember that I took Mom to the Red Sox for Mother's Day. Since then, Cam has been talking about going to a BASEBALL GAME! "Daddy take me?". So I was looking around for a minor league game to go to - since I work in Lowell, I really only knew of the Lowell Spinners. But then, on Groupon, there was a deal for $14 for 2 VIP tickets plus 2 baseball hats with the Worcester Tornadoes. So I got that, figuring Aaron could take him one night. Of course, I screwed up and bought it twice. I tried to call the 1-800 number to get a refund, and was on hold for forever so just gave up. The groupon said to call a phone number to reserve your tickets... and when I called, the guy was like, um - that was a mistake. Just show up with your groupon the day of the game, we usually don't sell out.
Yeah. Can you envision that? Cam, wanna go to a baseball game with Daddy!? Oh, too bad buddy, they sold out. That would go over AWESOME.
So he told me I could also come to the corporate offices, and pick up the tickets there. I did that last night, and I was joking around with the guy - saying that 4 baseball hats was a bit much (hoping he would maybe give us a tee shirt or something instead) and he told me that if we went to the June 13th game - which was when I was planning on going - the baseball hats they had ordered for this deal wouldn't be in yet, so they were going to give out 2 more free tickets! Love it. So I've gotten 6 tickets for $28 (plus 2 baseball hats).
I just love a good deal. Love it.
Just this past week I've gotten two awesome deals. First was $45 for 6 meals at Dream Dinners. Where I go every single month to make my food. That normally would have cost me $70. Sweet! I must have re-read the fine print 100 times to be sure that existing customers could use that deal. Which we could - hurrah!
Perhaps you remember that I took Mom to the Red Sox for Mother's Day. Since then, Cam has been talking about going to a BASEBALL GAME! "Daddy take me?". So I was looking around for a minor league game to go to - since I work in Lowell, I really only knew of the Lowell Spinners. But then, on Groupon, there was a deal for $14 for 2 VIP tickets plus 2 baseball hats with the Worcester Tornadoes. So I got that, figuring Aaron could take him one night. Of course, I screwed up and bought it twice. I tried to call the 1-800 number to get a refund, and was on hold for forever so just gave up. The groupon said to call a phone number to reserve your tickets... and when I called, the guy was like, um - that was a mistake. Just show up with your groupon the day of the game, we usually don't sell out.
Yeah. Can you envision that? Cam, wanna go to a baseball game with Daddy!? Oh, too bad buddy, they sold out. That would go over AWESOME.
So he told me I could also come to the corporate offices, and pick up the tickets there. I did that last night, and I was joking around with the guy - saying that 4 baseball hats was a bit much (hoping he would maybe give us a tee shirt or something instead) and he told me that if we went to the June 13th game - which was when I was planning on going - the baseball hats they had ordered for this deal wouldn't be in yet, so they were going to give out 2 more free tickets! Love it. So I've gotten 6 tickets for $28 (plus 2 baseball hats).
I just love a good deal. Love it.
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
More Random
But no pictures today!
First exciting bit of news is that I'm back at the gym. I went on Saturday with some prompting from my cousins who were visiting, and I forgot how great it makes me feel. Every. Single. Time. I get it when they say that people who are depressed should exercise - and how hard it is to convince those people to do it. It IS hard to get off your ass. And in my case, I feel like I don't get anything out of it (because I don't lose weight) but I do! I slept like a rock last night, and I just feel better after working out. So I'm going to try to stick with this. But not put pressure on myself to do it.
I want the Old Navy Gay Pride shirts for my kids. But they aren't being sold online and only in 26 stores. One is in MA, so I'm going to call and see if I can get them. And no. I don't think I'm using my kids as a political platform. My values, that I'm trying to instill in my children, are based around the rule 'Do unto others as you would have them do onto you'. And our church teaches us to Stand on Side of Love. That is what I do everyday (or at least try to) and I hope to teach my children to do the same. So yep, Cam and Maggie will be wearing those shirts (assuming I can get them) - I feel that we should support a 'big box' retailer that is putting themselves out there for a cause that is controversial
I've gone from someone who used to knit or quilt every day to barely knitting once a week! I'm just not inspired. Besides that it's wicked hot (which has never stopped me from knitting in the past) both kids were refusing to wear ANY sweater/fleece/sweatshirt by the end of the winter - and I'm just not into spending the time to knit something that won't be worn. I'm test knitting a cute stuffed bunny pattern, so I hope that kicks my creative side back into gear!
And finally, I'm starting to worry about what to wear to this wedding I'm going to in India! I need to find a store in the area where I can see what I look like in some of the outfits people are recommending for me.
First exciting bit of news is that I'm back at the gym. I went on Saturday with some prompting from my cousins who were visiting, and I forgot how great it makes me feel. Every. Single. Time. I get it when they say that people who are depressed should exercise - and how hard it is to convince those people to do it. It IS hard to get off your ass. And in my case, I feel like I don't get anything out of it (because I don't lose weight) but I do! I slept like a rock last night, and I just feel better after working out. So I'm going to try to stick with this. But not put pressure on myself to do it.
I want the Old Navy Gay Pride shirts for my kids. But they aren't being sold online and only in 26 stores. One is in MA, so I'm going to call and see if I can get them. And no. I don't think I'm using my kids as a political platform. My values, that I'm trying to instill in my children, are based around the rule 'Do unto others as you would have them do onto you'. And our church teaches us to Stand on Side of Love. That is what I do everyday (or at least try to) and I hope to teach my children to do the same. So yep, Cam and Maggie will be wearing those shirts (assuming I can get them) - I feel that we should support a 'big box' retailer that is putting themselves out there for a cause that is controversial
I've gone from someone who used to knit or quilt every day to barely knitting once a week! I'm just not inspired. Besides that it's wicked hot (which has never stopped me from knitting in the past) both kids were refusing to wear ANY sweater/fleece/sweatshirt by the end of the winter - and I'm just not into spending the time to knit something that won't be worn. I'm test knitting a cute stuffed bunny pattern, so I hope that kicks my creative side back into gear!
And finally, I'm starting to worry about what to wear to this wedding I'm going to in India! I need to find a store in the area where I can see what I look like in some of the outfits people are recommending for me.
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