So. I'm pregnant. I really thought that once I got to this point, after 3 years of trying, I would be over the moon excited. Aaron and I would be running around the house jumping for joy that we were finally having a baby. I'd be knitting baby items by the boatload, and reading anything I could get my hands on about being pregnant, giving birth, and little babies. It's kind of like I kind of expected a parade. I envision myself on a float, holding my positive HPT with confetti flowing around me because everyone (including me) was SO excited that I was pregnant.
But I'm not. At first, I was guarded. I didn't want to open my heart up for the potential hurt if something went wrong. Now that we are starting to tell people, I guess it's just not happening like I expected. Aaron is so wrapped up in work, and the huge projects that we have going on in the house and coaching soccer that he is more stressed out than excited (I think.). My mom is super excited, but is obviously tempering her excitement with caution. Others I know are excited for me, but are just treating me like a normal pregnant lady. Which, honestly, I am. I don't know if I was expecting people to bow down before me and make offerings to my fertility? I'm a bit of a hormonal freak, I guess.
I think the biggest factor is that I'm just so tired. And that is my biggest complaint. And it makes me feel like a lame ass. Other friends of mine who are pregnant have all these stories of throwing up and constant nausea and 'round ligament pain'... I'm just tired. Mind numbingly tired. I go to work, come home, try to go for a walk, make dinner, and then stay up for an hour, tops. Go upstairs and fall asleep - only to wake up at 1 AM. And stay awake for a few hours. And then fall asleep again.
This level of tiredness is effecting everything. I forget to do things. I want to help Aaron work on the huge list of 'to-do's' that we have - but the second he says I don't have to, I jump on the offer and go inside and relax. It's making me hyper sensitive to anything people say. Which makes for a not so fun Cece.
You are supposed to get you energy back after the first trimester - lets hope that happens!