Friday, July 25, 2008

21 weeks

I have to admit, when I wasn't pregnant, and desperately trying to get that way... I would read all the blogs of the pregnant IFers and wonder why they weren't embracing the pregnancy. Or why they would say things like "it's starting to look like I'm really bringing home a baby in X days".

Now I totally get it. The first half (or more!) of pregnancy is filled with worrying that things aren't going to stay put. Once you get out the first trimester, you start feeling better, but don't feel any movement or anything... so it still doesn't seem real. Then, you start feeling random bits of movement, and you get worried that in the 'big' ultrasound, maybe something will be wrong. I'm finally past all those bits... and I'm really realizing that a baby will be entering our house on or about Dec 5th.

So I've started asking friends that already have babies for advice on what I should get and register for - and the opinions are overwhelming! Mostly they are telling me stuff NOT to buy. If I listen to everyone, all I would have when the baby arrives is a sling, a car seat and 1 or 2 onsies. And I would getting most everything second hand from a consignment shop. I'm also really starting to knit for the baby (I'm a bit of a 'hardcore' knitter). And people see the little sweaters and booties and tell me that there is no point to knit the tiny things.

And they make a good point - you don't know if your baby will like the bouncy seat or the bassinet or if breastfeeding will work out and I know that little newborns get changed constantly and getting them in and out of sweaters might be a pain and they grow super fast and booties fall off.... but geez! I'm FINALLY ready to buy baby stuff! And register for baby stuff! And daydream about making the nursery cute! And many don't know I bought yarn over 3 years ago in anticipation of this pregnancy. I even have a post on my knitting blog where I talk about yarn I bought in 2006 to knit baby items. ....

While keeping my friends advice in mind... I'm making my first big trip this weekend to BRU and did start a bit of a registry at The Right Start. Last night, I ordered an Amby Baby bed, knowing full well that maybe my baby won't like motion when it sleeps (although anyone I know that has one thinks it's the most awesome thing ever, I do know that I could resell it on Craig's list for just a bit less than I paid for it new). And I'm happily knitting on baby sweaters and booties fully aware that some of them may never even get worn. I don't care. Sure, I may waste time knitting things that aren't going to be worn more than once. And yeah, maybe I could have gotten some things for the baby cheaper at yard sales and consignments shops.

But hey - I thought that I was going to get pregnant the month I went off the pill. I will plan for the best, and accept that maybe my baby will be allergic to wool and will only sleep while being held. Like Aaron says - we expect the best, but also plan for the worst, right!

21 comments:

Zephra said...

You knit on honey and put that baby in everything you make...even if it is only for a few minutes to take pictures. You worked hard to get to this point and you enjoy every second of it.

There are, however, a lot of things that are a waste of money. Take the experienced parents advice on what not to waste your money on. There are enough things that you will need to fill your registry.

Jen said...

The thing that helped me with registering was that the website would compare my registry and suggest items. That helped a lot.

Deborah said...

Over from ICLW-I say enjoy this time and do everything you ever dreamed of doing. You can't put a price tag on this baby, nothing you have done or ever will do is a waste. As the commercial says, with my twist of course, fertility treatments-xxx$$$, doctor's fee's XXX$$$, bringing home you new born baby-priceless.

Fertilized said...

yes the ass/advice will flow freely! Get what you want, how you want it when you want it! Have fun doing it

Lisa said...

You're 2 weeks ahead of me and I can completely relate to what you're saying! Especially the first paragraph. ;-) You do what you want and what makes you happy and I think it's awesome that you can knit!! How special that you can give your baby something that YOU made! I definitely do not have that talent. :-) I sit at work and put things on the BRU registry all day. LOL I haven't even done the in store one. Congrats and you look great!

Frieda said...

This baby is going to be one very well dressed baby. If you don't knit/make enough things for him/her, the rest of us will help you along. I think it is great that you are wanting to knit for them. Hope you have a fun weekend.

Martha said...

Wishing you the best, thanks for sharing, from ILCW.

Helene said...

Congratulations. Such exciting news, but I can only imagine how worrisome everything may be. Do you watch Tori Spelling's show? It's great to watch her be so human with her loving worries for her unborn (during taping) baby.

Best of luck.
Helene via iclw

edie & ella said...

I like Aarons philosphy -- expect the best.
It's hard to resist all the cutesie needless stuff. I have a nursery FULL of it X 2..... if nothing else you can take pictures of the baby with all the gadgets and post them for us to see. Even if you don't use any of the stuff -- pictures are fun. SAM

~Jess said...

Go ahead with your plans: Revel in your pregnancy! I definitely think there are things that we're told we have to have for a baby, but don't need(just like the wedding industry).

ICLW

Sugar and Ice said...

You should register for whatever you want. I used TONS of baby products/gear with Lila, and there are very few things I wouldn't recommend. Actually, there are things I wish I'd had that I didn't, and I hope to get them this time.

emily said...

I'm glad you are enjoying yourself! I really liked having a bouncy seat, to keep Natalie with me when I was doing my "chores," (dishes, laundry, whatever) because I couldn't let her out of my sight! You know me, crazy to the bone. When she got a little bigger, the baby gym was a fun thing... you know those things that sit on the floor with things on the mat and dangly things over the top? Not to overwhelm you, but those were probably my 2 favorite things. And the fact that she was ultimately bottle fed and Eric could feed her too. ;)

theycallmebobby said...

I say register away - let someone else buy it! If you don't need it, you can take it back, sell it. Doesn't matter. You didn't buy it anyway. And as far as knitting for the baby you just keep your knit on girl! You have dreamed of this day for so long you deserve to knit anything and everything you ever dreamed of for this baby. Yes, the booties will fall off but you know what....those little fat toes will be warm when they do! Remember, opinions are like assholes - everyone has one! Just go with your gut (teehee budda belly) and you will be fine. Congrats!

Amy said...

Sounds like you have the right idea about things. It's good to take people's advice. But you also have to make it work for you. Seems like you're doing that. Good luck!

ICLW

Just Me. said...

Yeah I am just 5 weeks and I am very very worried...I just wish i could get my baby the way i got my furry baby - fast and too easy!

Baby shopping sounds exciting. :)

Kristine said...

You will love, love, love the Amby! It saved my sanity!

My only problem now is getting baby boy to sleep in a real crib now that he's a bit past 8 months and trying to climb around in the Amby.

As for registering and knitting. Girl, you deserve to do all of those things! If you don't, you might look back some day and regret that you didn't.

Sure, there are things that are a waste of money that you may not use. Listen to the advice, then do what you think is best. What one person loves another will think is a waste of money. It's all personal opinion.

Congrats and enjoy!

ICLW

nh said...

I think your right - do what you want to do, if that's knit do it. Enjoy it, you've earnt it.
(ICLW)

Chelle said...

It is so fun when you get to that stage. I haven't quite been there yet, but I have been through the first stages that I think every IFer goes through, and it feels amazing when you make those mental break throughs.

Knit on! Buy all the baby things you want! This is your first and you went through a lot to get here. Do what makes you happy and makes you feel fulfilled. :)

Deborah said...

You know, you're doing all the shopping and knitting for you, not your baby! So go ahead. If you want to feel a little more practical, though, you could knit some stuff in larger sizes when s/he might be able to wear them for longer. But you know what? This baby might wear the items once, and then your next child might wear the items once, and you might pass them on to a niece or nephew or cousin, and then a grandchild... I have some handmade stuff like that and it's so special to have, knowing someone was so excited about the birth of my sister or cousin they made something by hand.

Lucia said...

Based on my experience, here is what you will need to start with:
- About a zillion, all right, at least 15, stretchy suits with feet in the 3-6 month size. (Any smaller will be too small, if not immediately then after the first week.) El cheapo/secondhand ones are fine: the little guyl won't be wearing them for that long. You need that many because TLG will be a random laundry generator, sometimes staying all day in one outfit and sometimes running through six in half an hour.
- Another zillion in the 6-9 month size.
- A container, bouncy seat, baby swing, crib, bassinet, whatever, for each room in your house. Something you can put TLG down in/on for two minutes when you need both hands free/must move fast. Do not neglect the bathrooms. (Believe it or not I still have a couple I'd be willing to part with.)
- Waterproof pads of various sizes to put between TLG and said containers. Newborns are extremely leaky people. You will need quite a few of these too: the idea is to put them on top of whatever you don't feel like washing three times a day, which means you'll be washing a lot of pads.
- About a zillion t-shirts for you.
- Snot extractor. (This has a politer name, but I can't remember it.)
- Thermometer. It's probably worth getting the least invasive/quickest-reading one you can (just this morning I encountered one that you just scoot across the kid's forehead), but also keep at least one low-tech one in case the electronic gizmo breaks.
- Baby toothbrush.
- Diapers and wipes. If your kid is nearly as big as mine s/he will grow out of the newborn-size diapers before leaving the hospital.
- Bottles, but you probably won't need them right away.

I'm sure I've forgotten something. Maternity does induce a certain amount of amnesia.

Oh, and congrats! Each day from here on out will leave you more breathless. Literally.

Lucia said...

Oh, also at least six or seven receiving blankets. You can make these out of any random flannel cloth, about 3 feet square, should you feel so inclined. (3 feet will be way too big at first, but not for long, and you can always fold them.)