Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Elevated Emotions: Handling the Ups and Downs

Ha. That was the title of the weekly e-newsletter that I get from Lamaze International. This whole pregnancy thing has been pretty great. I've felt good, things have been going well. Sure - I was nervous to hit certain milestones.... but I've been pretty 'ok' since April 1st. If you read back through old posts - the ups and downs of TTC, watching friends and family get pregnant before me, month after month of hope, dread and disappointment.... that was BRUTAL. Looking at my calender, thinking about taking a vacation day (or two) I was noticing that I had taken sick days around CD1 on different months. And I remember - I would wake up and have my period, and just want to hide in bed from the whole world. It sucked. For me, I was an emotional wreck... which honestly - doesn't happen that often.

But this week! Jesus. I think the big reason is that I have an insane amount of thing going on right now. My work is going through a re-org - and it's somewhat stressful to see where things are going to shake out in the end. Add on 2 MAJOR production issues in the past week, which turned out NOT to be an issue from my team... but at first all fingers were pointing to us? Nice and stressful. We've got Aaron interviewing for jobs - which is GOOD stress. I can't stop day dreaming about the thought that he'll get one of these great jobs (read significantly better salary) and I won't have to stress over the $1800 a month for day care!

The thing that is really getting to me? My preggo belly is like the lightening rod for assvice. I'll be at the gym on the elliptical... people talk about if they think I should be working out or not. I'm in line at the grocery store? Someone will make a comment about the sugar substitute lemonade I have in my cart. At work? People will ask if I'm coming back after maternity, assuming I'll say no. When I say yes? That leads to another 5 minute commentary on what they think I should do. I even get random people saying 'Epidurals are a gals best friend' (remembering that I'm trying to have a natural birth).

And it's all getting to me. I'm cranky. I'm tired from lack of sleep (which I remedied last night with Tylenol PM - come on - I dare you to question if I should take it. My doc said it was fine!) I want to get back to the easy, fun part. And I'm sure I will... but right now - it's like I can't avoid thinking about all the advice. Aaron said to me - well, just don't talk about the baby with people. And I had to explain, when you have an obvious baby belly - it isn't like I'm the one starting the conversation! Sigh.

15 comments:

amysue said...

Ugh. I hate when people offer their stupid opinions (I won't deign to call it advice) about pregnancy, child rearing etc., unasked.

I still remember standing in line in Cambridge at an ATM with Em (then 2) and some tweedy professor type reaching down and taking the binky out of her mouth and telling me to toss it! I told him I was two seconds away from having him arrested for assault and he told me I had anger issues and should seek therapy. Heh. Good times!

sukeyknits said...

I heard using plastic or metal knitting needles when you're pregnant isn't healthy for the baby. I hope you've been using only the bamboo ones. But only hte ones that are made from the bamboo harvested from Heilongjiang province in NE China.

I'd like to think that when I'm pregnant, I might play a little with strangers. i.e. when they ask how far along I am, I pretend I'm not prenant. That would cut out all the comments. But not too nice I guess, also not sure if I could pull it off. Guess I'll have to wait and see.

So glad to hear everything is going well. I also heard that being around stupid people (ie work, etc) can effect the IQ of the baby. Maybe I should come over sometime soon :)

Sugar and Ice said...

Sorry about the unsolicited advice. It is a major pain, and it only gets worse after the child actually arrives. Just be honest with people and let them know how annoying it is.

Zephra said...

You need a t-shirt that says, stop giving me advice or something like that...but honestly, $1800 on day care? DAMNNNNNNN that is 3 times what you can get good quality care for here. That would stress me out thinking about it.

you know what you aught to do? You should.........

just kidding.

emily said...

My favorite advice was breastfeeding advice from a MAN... I think you could call him a murse? I'm sure he'd read everything ever written about it, but when the newborn baby's not eating, I really don't want to hear it, dude!

Fertilized said...

i hear ya sister - we are facing the same daycare bill and the assive part continues! I wish i could share with you that it stops!

Jen said...

Blech. So far I've avoided most of that. Perhaps it is because I stay in my house all the time and don't go out anywhere?

Kenya said...

Geez I feel you. The advice and comments don't stop! Get very used to it, and block it out.

auraleighb said...

I hear you on the advice and comments. My husband had the same words of "wisdom" for me until he seen a total stranger walk up to me in the grocery store and not only grab my diet pepsi from my cart, but touched my belly and started ranting and raving about caffeine and how bad for me and the baby. He was 10 ft away, but it only took him 2 seconds to shove her across the aisle from me. After that he understood that being prego brings out the psycho in total strangers and friends alike.
Tylenol PM is a blessing!! I had problems with leg spasms during my pregnancy. Night after night after night up walking the floors trying to stop the sensation that my legs would run off and leave me behind. My doctor suggested the same thing. A full nights sleep to a pregnant woman is like the most wonderful gift anyone can give ya. Enjoy it, and sleep darlin. Time will come soon enough to be "on call" thru the nights.
God bless you and your little family.

La La said...

I haven't gotten too much of the annoying advice yet (except from my mom, of course)...but I have gotten A LOT of the belly rubs. I'm just not sure how I feel about EVERYONE wanting to touch my belly. It's not really even all that exciting! lol

Hang in there hun.

edie & ella said...

About that Tylenol.. now I've heard that....... haha just kidding. The assvice has only just begun sweetie -- you just wait until that baby is here. Someone was just telling me the other day how I should get my twins out of my bed..... it is none of your damn beeswax where my babies sleep. right?
You will learn how to pretend like you didn't hear something and keep on walking....... from here on out. DON'T MAKE EYE CONTACT WITH ANYONE. NOT ANYONE -- and you may be safe....... sam

orodemniades said...

I'm sorry, did you say *$1800* a month?

On day care?

swoon

That's more than I earn in 3 months! (parttime)

Wishing 4 One said...

OMG filks are crazy aren't they? I so cannot understand why they feel the need to tell you what to eat/drink, how to deliver and crazy sh.t like that. Here in crazy Cairo, you should hear some of things people start talking about when someone is pregnant, its actually hillarious to me. Example- "don't keep a cat around, it prevents you from getting pregnant." Yes someone actually said that to me. I guess here its cultural maybe, old wives type tales, but all the ass.vice your getting is just plain stupid. Next time someone tries to give their opinion, kindly hold up a post it stating "i cannot hear you nor see you, go away NOW." Anyway feel better and don't let the losers get to you.

Frieda said...

My best advice is selective hearing. You had it as a child, start again with it. Totally ignore people and they will shut up. I am so glad you are doing great otherwise.

Erin said...

Just dropping a line to say that I made my blog password protected. If you would like to be able to read it, email me your email address. emmhollar@yahoo.com.