Things that piss me off

• Losing this post once and having to retype it!!! Augh!!!!
• The fact that Kirkland brand diapers (that's the Costco brand) are the EXACT SAME PRICE as Huggies. What is the point? Shouldn't they be cheaper? I read online that they were like .17 versus .22! It's a big fat lie! Aaron did the math, and they came out to the EXACT SAME PRICE.
• Wallpaper. And the fact that I have to remove it.
• When my VOIP works such that I can hear the person talking perfectly, but they can't hear me. (the comcast guy came yesterday and it should be fixed now)
• Dogs that take my nice, clean pillows off the couch and put their nasty, muddy faces all over them.
• The same dogs that negate my kitchen floor cleaning by drinking water out of the dog bowl and getting the water everywhere. Dirty dog paws + water = mud foot prints. I will admit, that me caring about the cleanliness of the floor is a new thing - usually the floor gets cleaned every two weeks. But, thanks to Hulk crawling around the kitchen floor the other day and ending up with black knees I suddenly feel the need to keep the floors a little cleaner. I got a swiffer wet jet. Loves it.
• Signing up for a stupid picture thing on my birth board where we have to take this damn stuffed animal we are sending around the country somewhere with our babies and take pictures. Finally remember to take the fucking pictures, post them on the birth board, and NO ONE COMMENTS. What is the point!!? Can I even tell you what a pain in the ass it was to take pictures of this stupid thing without Hulk tossing it in the water or eating it?!?! GAH. I finally sent the god damn thing onto the next person so it stops mocking me from the back seat of my car.

I know this post makes me sound cranky, and maybe I am - but we did have a great weekend. I just keep thinking of these little things that are annoying me and maybe posting them will make me stop thinking about them! I swear - the costco diaper thing happened a week ago and I'm still fired up about it.

Smile on a Saturday

I know I don't usually post on the weekends, but thought this would send a few smiles around on this rainy day.

Food obsession

Two things I'm obsessed with right now, and they are both food related. The first is for Aaron and I - freezing seasonal fruit. I love blueberries and Aaron loves peaches. We happen to have a peach tree in our front yard that REALLY produces peaches (Aaron swears we picked 50 lbs of fruit this year). So a few weeks ago, we basically would sit in the kitchen and peel peaches for about an hour a night to try and get as many frozen as possible. They are for wonderful peach pies in the winter (which is an amazing treat). In blueberry news, a few weeks ago when I went up to the cabin for the day, I stopped at my favorite blueberry place, Sussman's - where I usually ask my mom to get me a 4 qt pail to last me through the winter. I usually eat about 1/2 right away, and then store the rest for blueberry muffins and pie. This was the first year I went myself- and they sell 20 lb boxes! Good GOD! I bought the 20 lbs, shared a bunch (like 2 quarts) with Suzanne, ate some, and today, separated the box into 38 CUPS of blueberries. Heaven.

So we have enough fruit for at least 4 peach pies and 5 blueberry pies plus like 18 more cups of blueberries for muffins and pancakes... Happy sigh.

I also made some more adventurous food for Hulk last night:

• Blueberry applesauce (which I fed him right away - HUGE hit)
• Banana/avocado (he had it this morning for breakfast.... LOVED)
• Tofu/banana/strawberry
• Tofu/banana/blueberry
• Pumpkin with Cinnamon
• pumpkin/peaches

Only thing that was 'fresh' were the bananas and avocado - the rest came from a can (the pumpkin - get the plain pumpkin NOT the pie filling) or frozen. I think I spent maybe 20 minutes each time as I only have 3 ice cube trays - so I can only make a little bit at a time.... but damn. Easy. And huge cost savings. I'm sad that I didn't start this sooner, but happy that I figured it out before the twins came. Oh - and I get all my recipes (such as they are - it's mostly pureeing stuff together with my immersion blender) from this website. It's actually run by a woman I used to work with! She quit working with us after the birth of her twins, and concentrated on this website - which is doing great. Her husband still works at my company, and he pointed me to this great resource.

A hit! And a new nursery idea

Well, the homemade food was a hit with last night's dinner... so I'm going to keep going with it. Someone pointed out that I could do fruits by just getting the frozen stuff and using my immersion blender on it - and duh! Of course I could! I totally felt like Suzy homemaker this morning when I packed Hulk's food for school - melon cubes (huge fav), a banana, my own carrots and peas - and he'll have cereal and bottles too - but it's like I'm fulfilling a little vision that I had when I first got pregnant with Hulk of me being this hippie crunchy, all-natural birth, baby-wearing, homemade baby food making, breastfeeding mama. So. I'm hitting ONE of those goals? That is decent, right?

As for him loving the homemade food, it's both a testament to how well he does with eating (he'll actually try textured things - for a while there he would make the crazy face when things had texture) and that I'm getting comfortable trying new stuff. And damn, I wish I tried this earlier. But I was really overwhelmed with the being pregnant thing, so just buying stuff at the store was easier. What a cost savings it is going to be! 2 chicken breasts have made it almost 2 weeks and I still have some left. A 1/2 bag of frozen peas and 2 smallish sweet potatoes filled up two whole ice cube trays! I guess one ice cube is equal to about 1 oz of food - so for like $3 I made the equivalent of $6 (or more) of store bought baby food. And it's a hell of a lot easier to store than all those little jars.

In nursery news, I'm thinking that the dots is a little too, well... dotty. What do we think of a princess theme? And I love these colors too - but they would be a hard sell with Aaron, I think...
(Picture taken from this etsy store)... and then I could throw a fire breathing dragon on another wall!



I'm realizing that I'm kind of making up for my mom never letting me have a 'themed' room - but hey. It's all about me until the girls want something different. And how much fun is the dragon?

Nice and slow

This week has been pretty slow with work, so I've had some time to get a few things cleaned up around the house. I organized some toys and put away some things that don't need to be out anymore - the swing he is too big for, the jumpy seat he was never a fan of and the exersaucer he never uses. Even the pack-n-play we used to use as a changing table downstairs - Aaron finished the downstairs bathroom! So I have that counter as a changing table now, hurrah! It felt really good to get some of the BIG things out of the living room - I swear, the second the twins outgrow stuff - it is LEAVING this house. The amount of space that is filled with swings and pack-n-plays and toys is staggering. And the fact that we are going to need two of a bunch of it...phew. I think I'll be tougher than some - those who are too sad to be done with the baby stage to get rid of things. I'll totally purge it. I swear. Not saying I won't be sad - but these twins are 100% our final babies!

We also organized our mess of sheets and towels, which sounds like a minor thing, but it was a big pain in the ass. We got rid of our linen closet for the laundry closet upstairs. And ever since, sheets and towels have been floating around our bedroom.

I also took some time to make a bit of homemade baby food. I had already cooked up some chicken and pureed it. Everything I've read said to puree it and then freeze in ice cube trays. Someone suggested I add yogurt - but I was able to just freeze the chicken and it was great. I would mix it in with a vegetable, and he eats it great for dinner. I've been meaning to try other easy things that I know he likes - so this morning I steamed up some peas, carrots and sweet potatoes. I pureed them and froze them in the ice cube trays. It was really simple, and seriously, took maybe 30 minutes total. If he likes them, I'm going to keep up with the veggies. The fruits are a bit more complicated - so I'll probably keep buying those (except applesauce - he likes plain old Motts - I don't buy the special baby kind).

That is all the excitement around here today... big time fun, huh?

Little bit whiney.

Well, maybe more than a little bit. And I feel kind of bad about it. I went today from my 24 week checkup, and all is great. Blood pressure good, babies sound good, and I'm up 8 pounds total (at this point in my pregnancy with Hulk, I was up 13 pounds- of course, I started about 10 pounds heavier this time...). Since Friday I've been feeling a little beaten down, I guess is the best way to say it. Everything that I want to do is tempered by the pregnancy. My knee hurts, rolling over at night hurts, getting Hulk in and out of his car seat is a pain.... wah wah wah. I feel like I enjoyed be pregnant so much more with Hulk. And I feel like an ass for not feeling that way this time! It's almost laughable that we tried so hard to get pregnant the first time, and now I have the audacity to whine about things this time.

I said that to my doc, and she was like - I really feel for you. She told me that everything the second time around (even if there are years between pregnancy) is harder. You've got less down time, because you have your first baby to look after, and everything will just stretch out faster and more this time. She said to just think a few years ahead, when things will be back to normal (at least with my body). God I hope so. I would love to get my body back to where it was before all the fertility treatments! But that will take a lot of work. Which I'm willing to do - I just know it'll be hard with 3 babies to run around after (or does that count as cardio?).

Anyway - she confirmed that I'll be in the hospital for 4 days after the c-section. But that they just don't schedule c-sections for twins this early, since there are so many factors in when they would be delivered. They just keep monitoring me with monthly ultrasounds, and starting at week 31, twice weekly non-stress tests. Goodie. I'll enjoy this last month or so of minor doctor appointments - because looks like I'm going to have a huge amount of visits to the doctor come October/Nov.

Kicked

First, let's talk about Mary Ellen and Steve, who have kicked IF's ass and welcomed their little (well not so little! She was over 6 lbs!) girl into the world! ME was the person who pushed me to go to a new doctor, actually gave me the name of the doctor who treated me more like a human being (i.e not telling me I was fat every visit) and got me pregnant! ME gets credit for me not killing my first doc AND for Hulk entering this world. When she went on bed rest with her triplets, I came out of my little hole (I'm always so nervous to meet bloggers in person) and was going to go teach her how to knit and bring her some of my famous chili. Unfortunately (and pretty scary for all involved) she ended up losing the triplets and getting a pretty serious infection in the process. I'm so glad that Amelia is now their happy ending (beginning?)!

I'm now getting kicked majorly from the inside. Usually I'll get a few warm up kicks and then WHAM! But yesterday, one of the girls kicked me so hard it made me jump! Crazy. With Hulk, it was more like a bunch of gentle taps... comforting really. But these gals are really beating me up! And I still have 15 weeks to go!

I find myself longing for things I will be able to do when I'm not pregnant anymore... like working out. Even taking the dogs for a walk in the woods. Or planning a weekend away. Ok, I know I won't be planning weekends away very much in the few years, but there is someplace I'd like to go in October (Rhinebeck, NY for a Sheep and Wool festival) and besides the fact that the doctor doesn't want me going more than 2 hours away from home after 30 weeks.... I can't imagine I would have much fun. I'm already waddling when I walk. By then I'll be 33 weeks pregnant, and I can't even imagine how huge I'll be at the end of October. Walking around a festival doesn't seem like the best idea. So, while I'm loving the good parts of being pregnant, I'm also looking forward to when I can just go out for a walk and not worry about my heart rate or how far into the woods I'm walking. Or get excited about going to an event and not stress about the amount of driving/walking involved. And the big bit? Reclaiming my body!

It's all going according to plan...

First, I had a growth ultrasound this morning, and both girls (yep - still girls) look great. I'm technically 23 weeks, and Baby A is measuring 23w4d and 1 lb 6oz, and Baby B is at 23w3d and 1 lb 5oz. I have some sweet profile pictures - but I'll have to wait to get Aaron to upload them for me.

This weekend, I had this big plan to wake up on Saturday morning, and drive Hulk up to the cabin for the day - Aaron still is working on the basement and it was going to be super hot. So I figured I would go up and spend the day with my mother at the lake. It was perfect! Hulk woke up at about 7, had a bottle and we got in the car, where he slept for the whole ride. We got to the cabin at 10:30, had breakfast, went straight to the lake to play - and it turns out it was field day! They organize a bunch of fun games for kids and a BBQ every summer - the beach was loaded with kids, and there was a bouncy house too. Hulk was FASCINATED by all the activity, and happily played until 3 PM. I then loaded him back in the car, where he passed out until we got home at 5. OF course, I guess I really burned him out, because Sunday, his godmother came to visit, and he took 2 huge naps during the day, so she didn't really get to play with him. But we made progress on wallpaper removal. Wait until you see the fabulous wallpaper we uncovered!

Another thing that is going really well are my plans for what is going to occur when the twins arrive. I was all nervous to have the different discussions with various family members, as much of the stuff I was going to talk about is sensitive in one way or another (i.e I don't want my father coming, I won't let my mother bring her untrained dog, and who knows what drama will be going on with Aaron's mother). I have it all broken up week by week, with the assumption that I go with a scheduled c-section on Nov 30th.

• Weekend BEFORE the baby comes. My mom arrives and helps gets everything settled - making sure laundry is up to date, there is food in the frig... so when we get home, the house is in good shape.
• Nov 30th - In hospital for 3 days (or however long it will be with the c-section - need to confirm). Someone in town (godmother or Aaron's Aunt) will stay at our house and take Hulk to daycare. Aaron and I will come home and it will be just us for that first week so we can not worry about guests and/or family drama that first week
• Dec 7th - Aaron still off work, my mother comes for a few days WITHOUT her dog. (she actually agreed this weekend that is the best idea - that dealing with 3 boxers and 3 babies is a lot of work).
• Dec 15th - Aaron goes back to work, and my stepmother arrives (possibly for 2 weeks, but maybe 1). She is the most helpful of all the family members. And my father will NOT be coming. I talked to them this weekend! And it was HIS idea, I didn't even need to bring it up!
• Christmas week - Possibly my MIL comes (god save me - but she is great with babies, we just need to pray for minimal family drama)
• Final week in Dec - Another of Aaron's aunt arrives.
• Jan 4th - nanny starts!

Getting most of this nailed down is great news for me. I was very nervous about confronting my mother about her dog, and the potential of having my father here for an extended period with newborns in the house. Those both cleared themselves up... final step is deciding about when my MIL will come. But I like the current plan.

Where babies come from

There has been a series of articles in my local paper's website from a woman who conceived her children using clo.mid. Her 5 year old has started asking questions about where babies come from - and she wants to know how to explain that she had to take special medicine to get pregnant. When I read the first article, my first thought was - why tell? I don't know her exact situation, but I know that my sub-fertility was totally unexplained. Not one test proved or reason was found for why it took us 3 years, clo.mid, an ectopic pregnancy, a miscarriage and 2 rounds of IVF to get pregnant. I don't think I'm passing on anything to my children that will cause them to be sub-fertile. The comments got me somewhat riled up though, as the question of whether fertility should be covered by insurance came up - and someone compared covering fertility to getting liposuction. Jesus.

But I let it go, because you know the world is filled with crazies - and I hate to comment on things like that - it just fuels the crazy.

In the second article, she acknowledges that she now realizes that her reaction to her son asking about how babies are made was in reaction to HER feeling about how HER babies were made. I get that. But, I must admit, that the further I get from it all, the less it bothers me. I think that I had it easy, as Aaron was a very supportive partner and I really had minimal side effects from the drugs. No matter how 'easy' I had it, during an IVF cycle you are totally wrapped up in the whole thing. Injections. Daily blood draws and ultrasounds. Waiting. Hoping. Freaking out. For me, all of this was done with a 40 minute one way drive into boston to my clinic for the daily blood draws and u/s, so my work also suffered. I will admit that after Hulk was born, I had pretty much made my mind up to not do IVF again. I figured we would try naturally for a while and if I got to the end of the 3 years of storage that we paid for, I would consider a frozen cycle. Who knows - maybe by then the awfulness of the hope/freak out/sadness/hope would have dimmed, and I would have considered IVF again. I'm not sure.

But will I tell Hulk that he is an IVF baby? I'm thinking I will just because the whole family knows and I'm sure it will come out somehow. And I will explain that we had a little help getting pregnant with him and it was totally worth it (kind of like my mom says that the disastrous relationship she had with my father was worth it because she got me out of the deal). When he asks where babies come from? I'll start with the whole - from their mommy's belly, and move up to the age appropriate definitions as he gets older. But I'm not going to give him a huge medical breakdown on blasts and ultrasounds and all that. I just don't think it's necessary.

What you are all planning on doing when the time comes?

Ahhhh.

Hulk woke up this morning at 6:45. Bliss.

We had an exciting day yesterday. It started out with a visit to Boston (Hulk was fascinated by the traffic while we were waiting to cross the street. Buses! Wow!) to get a sign off by the surgeron.Everything was a-OK. Hurrah! And Hulk charmed pretty much everyone in the office, as usual.

Then, he went to school, and I was asked if it was OK for him to share in one of his schoolmate's birthday cake. I know he is only 8 months old, but I figured what the heck. He loved it.

I actually happened to stop by the school to drop something off just as he was having the cake - and they didn't manange to capture the shit eating grin he had on his face. This boy LOVED the cake. I got a little nervous as I drove away that we would have some fall out from all that sugar - but it looked like a much bigger peice than he really got.

Then, we went to the local fair for dinner. Met up with some of our friends and had fair food, while Hulk watched fasinated at all the rides and big kids and other fair goings on. Aaron even took him on the merry-go-round (which he wasn't all that sure about). By the time we got home, he passed out and slept all night.

All in all, a good day.

Seriously?

So. I was at a friend's cube yesterday gossiping about various items, mostly being the nursery, the fact that I'm due in 16 weeks, and the amount of work to be ready to have 3 children (like you can ever REALLY be ready, but anyway). He was suggesting I don't spend so much time in the house - which is a good point. When you sit there and see all the work and you really can't do much about it until you have a block of time, it's stressful to see it. Once Hulk can go swimming again, I think we'll be heading to the lake to go swimming after work - he thought that was great fun.

Anyway. The girl that sits next to him turns and says - did I miss something? You are pregnant!?

Um. Yeah. With twins.

So I went and took a picture of the belly and the outfit I was wearing. Did she seriously just think I was unfortunately pot bellied? Now I'm nervous that I look just fat and not pregnant. Sigh.

The Nursery

Well. I really haven't thought much about the twin's nursery - I've had a few other things going on. Besides, I know I have the furniture... so it hasn't really been at the forefront of my mind. But. I think I really need to get thinking on this if I'm going to get anything done before I'm too huge to help. This weekend, Suzanne is coming to see Hulk, and has volunteered to help remove some wallpaper. The next step would be to paint... what do we think of this idea?
Not those colors for sure. I'm still thinking of that red rug from Ikea (which I'm not finding on the website? Time to panic?!?) for the floor - so I was thinking red, pink, white and brown dots? Or maybe go crazy and do red/purple? I like the white and brown dots in there, since the furniture is a dark brown....but then I'm not sure about the paint color. I like the two-tone wall. If I do the red and pink - off white and pink? Or maybe light brown and pink? Or if it's purple, off white and purple? Help?!?

ETA: Here is some super awesome paint mock ups to assist opinions. I had trouble getting a decent 'light brown' color on paint...

Purple/Red dots:

Pink/Red Dots

Back to work.

Well. That was a great vacation! It was really a 'stay-cation' - because we didn't go anywhere besides our house, but it was good. Mon - Weds I just hung around, had some 'me' time with Hulk still going to daycare... and then the end of the week was reserved for surgery and recovery. And he is doing great - I'm so thankful that there is no need to worry about that anymore! I do wish Aaron and I had more time to just hang out together, but he was busy with his projects, and they need to get done, so I can't complain.

Spending all the time with Hulk over the past 4 days was great too. We have such a little gem in our son. He is all smiles - and I could spend all day just watching his joy as he discovers things. He is crawling at high speeds, and going EVERYWHERE. No longer does he need me in his sights.. now he does laps around the downstairs... trying to crawl up the stairs (god save me) and if he isn't crawling, he is pulling up on something. He needs to do all this activity with a toy in at least one hand, which has gone badly a few times.. but he is learning! So fast! It's unbelievable to me that 8 months ago we had just brought him home with us! The changes that happen in such a small time are almost a miracle.

Some commented that they didn't remember what the surgery was to correct - I never blogged about it. I'm just thinking 10 years in the future their may be a few things that Hulk won't forgive me for sending around the internet, and some details of his healthcare may be one of them.

Today I'm 22 weeks! I'm feeling great - actually after this vacation, a lot better. I was really having a lot of pain standing up for a past few weeks - but with a week to just hang out and nap almost every day.... I feel much better. Although I'm really considering getting one of those maternity support belts - anyone use those with success? It really feels like this pregnancy is flying by...considering they are scheduling my c-section for 38 weeks, I only have 16 weeks to go. (I hate typing my 'scheduled c-section'. I know my doc says we'll revisit it as I get closer, but I just have this feeling that it will be a c-section. On one hand, at least I know what to expect... but on the other....)

Anyway, 16 weeks... 4 months... until we go from a family of 3 to a family of 5! It has me ALMOST in freak out mode on the current state of the house. Aaron's project this week was enlarging and redesigning his workshop in the basement - which he wasn't really able to finish. I can't gauge how long it's going to take to finish - but it seems like a hell of a lot of work to me. And then, while he was working on the basement, he found a water leak in one of the pipes. Thank god he found it - but that resulted in a huge hole in the upstairs bathroom's wall and floor. After the basement is done, he needs to finish up work in the upstairs bathroom (he started installing a utility sink and cabinets in there after he moved the laundry upstairs... but things stalled when he realized he needed to use his table saw to cut some pieces. The table saw couldn't fit in his shop with the old setup, hence last week's project. Sigh.) And finally - the nursery! We have to install flooring and remove wallpaper and paint! Not a small list of shit to get done! Let's hope that it's less work than it appears to be...

What amazes me sometimes is that really, our house was in 'move in condition' when we bought it. Sure, lots of cosmetic stuff, but I feel like we are always tweaking and messing with it. I love every change we'd made, but I'll be thankful to have these few projects out of the way and the house in a stable state for a while when they are finished.

We are good.

The surgery went well - I think I cried more than Hulk did. Aaron went into the OR with him (to watch him 'gently go to sleep' as the doc said... and yes, that made me cry) - pregnant woman aren't allowed back there - and then we waited almost 2 hours for the procedure to be over. I was good for about 20 minutes... and then I was almost staring the door down for the doc to come in and tell us everything was ok.

And it was. He did great, everything seems fixed (we'll know more as things heal) and he woke up really well from the surgery. When we were let in to see him in recovery, that is when I cried for a bit - he looked so helpless there with all the tubes and everything!

The surgery was at 7:30, we got home at 12, and he fell asleep for about 3 hours. Then we got up and played a bit, took a walk around the block, and now he seems totally burned. So we gave him dinner and a bottle and put him to bed. I'm going to try to keep up with his pain meds until we go to sleep and hopefully he will stay nice and comfortable and get some good rest tonight. We go back on Weds of next week to for a follow up with the doc and get the dressings off... I'll be happy to get this all behind us!

Surgery is tomorrow and considering cloth diapering

So. Tomorrow is the big day, and I'm just glad the day is finally here, so we can just get it over with. Like I've said before, it's minor surgery to correct a minor birth defect - basically cosmetic surgery.... but DAMN. I worry about my little guy! Since we've been on vacation all week, we've gone to the town beach everyday, and he has been loving it. I feel like life is going to suck, because he can't be in the water for 10 days (at least) after the surgery - so the fun routine I've started is going to come to an end tomorrow. Sigh.

Anyway - think good thoughts for the Hulk. I'll report back tomorrow when we get home. He will be going in pretty early in the morning - so I'm hoping we'll be home in the afternoon.

On a completely different note, I went to a Mom's Group that Hulk and I used to go to when he was little and I was on maternity leave yesterday. It was a blast, and his cuteness was a big hit. At the store, they were selling G-diapers... which got me thinking. Now that we won't be using daycare come December... maybe I should look into cloth diapering. We can't do the G diapers because we have a septic system (and you flush the liners). But - a bunch of mom's have done the math, and cloth is significantly cheaper in the long run. More work - but cheaper. And I'm all about cheaper. I know Jen does cloth, and loves it. I think I would do disposables for newborn size, and then move onto cloth one they got a little bigger (don't think I want to deal with cloth when I'm dealing with tiny newborns and c-section recovery). So - I put a call into my nanny to see if she would be willing to deal with it - which I bet she will be.

Can't. Stand. The. Cuteness.

OK. I know he is MY son and I may be biased... but seriously.
The last 2 tries at swimming (AKA being near any water that wasn't the tub) have gone horribly. This weekend, Aaron is in CA with his buddies, so I decided to take a risk and visit my mom at the cabin. 2 good things from the weekend - Hulk had a BLAST playing at the beach - we were there for almost 5 hours! And.... my mom and I had fun. So it's all good.

But - as usual, Hulk slept like CRAP at the cabin, so we are both exhausted. Yep. It's 7:30 and I'm heading to bed.