So. I'm on day 4 of Lupron... and I'm noticing a marked difference in the way I'm dealing with this cycle than my first IVF cycle. I feel like last time I was already all obsessed with the shots and figuring out when my retrieval would be... not this time. I'm not freaked out.
I wonder if it has to do with the pledge I made to Aaron to not go on pregnancy.org. While all the woman there are really great, they kind of obsess about everything, and therefore have ME obsessing about everything. I am glad that I went there as a resource early on, but now, I really don't need the added stress. Dare I say it? Aaron was right.
Also - since last cycle was my very first cycle, I was pretty scared about everything. How I would react to the shots, the whole ER process, and what to expect.... this time? I know it really isn't all that bad (at least for me). I didn't have a horrible reaction to the drugs, the people in the IVF suite were so nice, and the procedures were really not that big a deal.
This time, I know what I need to ask for support. In a twist of good timing for us (but sad for him) Aaron's best friend broke up with his girlfriend, so will be staying with us for a while. So - we'll have him as a built in support system for little things like cooking food and taking care of the dogs on procedure days. Everyone at work is really supportive. And, this time I know what I need to ask for from my friends and family (mostly to keep me distracted!!!!).
Oh. And this time? We aren't telling my MIL, nor are we visiting her or anything. I think that Thanksgiving visit was about the worst idea I'd ever had.
I will say that I'm also not super excited, but I'm guessing that is because I'm trying to protect myself. I'm not really sure how I'm going to react to any outcome at this point. Nothing to do but wait and see.