Does anyone REALLY have this figured out? Something is ALWAYS going to 'win', right?And you are always going to feel guilty for NOT doing the other. It's a bitch of a situation. And honestly, I think these things have gotten worse. Kids are rarely outside without parents. Many parents forgo the bus and pick kids up at school (often to drive to super expensive extra curricular activities). So sure - the kids may be getting well rounded and being tended too - but what about the PARENTS? It seems to me that gone are the days that kids would play outside while mom got things done. Children are never alone - which means that parents are doing the 'work' they need to do when the kids are sleeping - leaving the parents no time for themselves. I remember that (after I did my huge list of chores and homework) I would go do something ALONE while my mom cooked or cleaned or whatever. She would leave me home alone while she went to meetings or whatever for the committees she was on.
Now, while I don't think I want to raise my kids exactly as I was (I think my mom missed out on having FUN with me) I am trying to find my version of balance. Like I said in an earlier post - we are finally getting our shit together. Having the ability to help a friend pack up her house to move. Having a mini-dinner party in the middle of the week with friends (take out sushi, but after baby bedtime). I made a fun tee-shirt quilt for my cousin who is about to graduate from high school. We are working at keeping the house in order so it's restful to sit instead of constantly looking at things that need to be dealt with. Organizing freezer meals. Bringing meals to a friend whose son just had open heart surgery.
Do I still feel like I should be doing more? Yes. I really want to find a reasonable way to motivate and work out more (perhaps that is this month's goal). I would love to be able to sit and really relax with Aaron and talk like we did in the 'olden days' (before we were interrupted every 3 seconds with a toddler request or are just too freaking tired to stay up late talking - and other things - in bed). But I'm starting to feel like we have much more balance in our lives. Instead of needing help from everyone, we are able to help others. Instead of depending on services like Dream Dinners, I'm doing it myself (at about maybe double the work, but a 1/4 of the price). Instead of spending 10 minutes in my closet trying to find a shirt, it's all nice and organized and I'm dressed in 5 minutes.
What about you all? Do you have a good balance?