Today is the EDD of my ectopic pregnancy. I'm not overwhelmingly sad, unless I really start to dwell on it. June 14th.... think about it. It's the most perfect due date ever. Give birth the end of spring, and take my 3 months of maternity leave over the summer. I'd get to spend a lot of time with my friends who are teachers... I was visualizing trips to my family's cabin the Berkshires, cute pictures of me 'showing' at Christmas...
But shit happens.
I'm not sitting here crying all day. Of course I wish I was already on the other side of this battle. But - we have a 'battle plan' and a path forward. And we are in a better place financially and physically this year than we were last. I just have to keep on focusing on the good - otherwise I think I would have sunk into a deep hole of depression.
Work continues to be brutal. I just walked out last night for a 6 mile walk. I hadn't been away from my computer (except to eat, go to the bathroom and sleep) since Monday. I needed to get some fresh air. It helped. And then this morning, I went to yoga for the first time since Saturday - and I felt like crap. I'm just so tired, and my shoulders are super tight from the stress. I'm glad I went, though.